I Make Me Crazy

It's easy to put the blame elsewhere, isn't it? She makes me crazy. He makes me crazy. They make me crazy. You are making me crazy. It's always about someone else. That's a cop-out. I make me crazy.

I've caught myself making these exact statements a lot, and it has been eye-opening to see the truth of the matter and the proper pronoun usage is I.

We girls especially have a tendency to pretend that we have no control over our thoughts, emotions, & feelings, but the hard truth is that if we don't control them, who will? No overly spiritual answers here. God controls all things, but there is also a thing called free will and sin which allows us the choice to dwell in all those feelings {etc} or not. That's the point I'm at. What will I choose to do today?

I can blame whoever I want, but the the only blame I can truly find is on myself. I can't control what other people say, do, think, or whatever; however, I am the only one who can control those things in myself.

I say all of this because lately I've felt like the champion of losing all control of my emotions. More times than I can count, God has convicted me with 2 Corinthians 10:5b. "We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ" {NIV}.

Am I going to take captive those thoughts? Or am I going to allow them to run rampant as they wish? Not taking those thoughts captive is a very dangerous thing. At least I know it is for me. It becomes all I can think about. And don't we all know that what we think about affects out attitude, our mood, our service. Yep, basically everything. I'm so guilty of this. But I'm so tired of allowing my circumstances and thoughts to have control. God has too great of plans for my life for me to waste even a second of it. God has equipped me with His Word to prepare me for this battle. I have to fight back. I will "take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."

No super profound thoughts here tonight. I just look back on my "single" years {which I technically only count from 21 to present considering I've always been single}, and I wonder how things might have been different had I learned this lesson earlier.

Better now than never. I'll never stop thanking God for the lessons He is teaching me during this season no matter how long it lasts.