The {Pride} Before the Fall

Jonah 3-4 SheReadsTruth

While reading chapter 4 of Jonah today, I became rather indignant that I would never expect God to treat anyone any different than me. Definitely not less. But better? Hmmm .... I didn't want my mind to go there. 

Jonah was angry. So angry {in fact} he would've rather died. {& girls are the dramatic ones?!?} okay. okay. kidding. God had mercy on such terrible and wicked people. But they needed salvation just as much as Jonah, right? Why was Jonah so angry? 

I could never relate to this story until today. God reminded me of how I'm just like Jonah. 

Now beware. This is the ugly side of me. The not pretty, not nice, not merciful side of me. That I'm anything but proud of. 

I've done everything possible to live my life by the book. Following the rules. Listening to my elders. Taking instruction. & so on & so on. I did everything right, so I should be rewarded with whatever I want, RIGHT??? 

This sounds even worse written out than it does in my head but here it goes:

I was obedient=I don't get a {insert boyfriend, skinny body, date, the list goes on}

Unnamed person is NOT obedient=She gets a {insert boyfriend, skinny body, date, etc} 

Here you are allowed to picture my 3 year old tantrum, because that is exactly what it is. 

I'm just like Jonah. Drowning in pity for myself & anger over things not going {my way}. Selfish, pitiful me. 

God's plans are bigger than my plans. His thought higher than my thoughts. Who am I? To judge? To decide? 

I'm not. 

But. 

I AM is. 

When I become prideful of what I have done, God has to use whatever measures necessary to bring me to my knees to remind me that He is the only one who has done anything. Scratch that. Everything. 

My precious God & Father, how I pray that my heart is moved into a position of gratitude and humility to become more of the woman you created me to be.